Written by Skywalkeer on 6:28 AM
Black Bart
Born: 1829
Died: Unknown
Wanted by: Wells Fargo detectives; lawmen in Oregon and California.
What the outlaw Black Bart (born Charles Bolles) lacked in big profits and violence, he more than made up for in style and good manners. For this reason, he is among the first outlaws ever to be known as ”the gentleman bandit.”
Bart was responsible for a string of stagecoach robberies, mostly in California and Oregon, and became a somewhat beloved figure for the poems he often left behind.
Bart was caught and sentenced to six years at San Quentin. Released after four, Bart took a room in a San Francisco boarding house. A month later, his room was found vacated, and neither he nor his body were ever seen again. Following this, a handful of unfounded rumors persisted that he was still alive, and at least one Wells Fargo stagecoach was robbed by a believed copycat of Black Bart.
Breaking the law, breaking the law... : Bart may be the only outlaw whose police report states that, “[he] was extremely proper and polite in behavior.”
Bonnie and Clyde
Born: Bonnie Parker, 1910; Clyde Barrow, 1909
Died: 1934
Wanted by: The FBI; lawmen in Texas, Louisiana, Oklahoma, and Missouri.
Bonnie and Clyde captured the imagination of an American public deep in the clutches of the Depression, which saw them as a romantic “Robin Hood” pair sticking it to the U.S. government. Bonnie’s savvy PR work -- largely in the form of poems sent to newspapers -- contributed greatly to this view.
While virtually no one has ever come forward to point the finger at Bonnie for being anything more than along for the ride, Clyde is believed to have been responsible for as many as 10 murders, along with dozens of robberies.
Today, the pair is legendary. Celebrated in films, songs and festivals, their names are synonymous with a strange amalgam of romantic intensity à la Romeo and Juliet, criminal violence and the supposed thrill of life on the run -- all of it romanticized way past any grain of truth.
Breaking the law, breaking the law... : Clyde claimed to have been abused while serving time in Texas, and he swore revenge on the Texas Department of Corrections. In early 1934, along with Bonnie and others, he got it when he masterminded the “Eastham Breakout,” which freed a number of prisoners and humiliated the Department. Unfortunately, one freed prisoner was Henry Methvin -- the man who would rat out Bonnie and Clyde to authorities.
Billy the Kid
Born: 1859
Died: 1881
Wanted by: U.S. Marshals; lawmen in New Mexico.
Born Henry McCarty, the legend of Billy the Kid is vastly divorced from reality, and in greater measure than perhaps any other figure of the Old West.
Billy’s greatest skill was not that of a quick-draw gunslinger, nor was he a particularly efficient thief. At most, he was good at escaping his jail cell. His last escape was also his most dramatic and deadly: Just weeks before he was set to hang for his involvement in the so-called Lincoln County Cattle War, Billy killed two guards and went on the run before being gunned down in New Mexico.
The man responsible for launching Billy’s legend was the very man responsible for killing him, famed Old West lawman Pat Garrett, whose post-mortem biography on Billy turned the virtually unknown criminal into a colorful outlaw.
Today, Billy’s legend is enormous, buoyed by colorful if fabricated anecdotes -- such as the claim that he killed one man for every year of his life. His tombstone has been stolen so many times that it is now protected by steel. He is the celebrated subject of a wealth of books, movies and television shows, and at least two men have come forward claiming to be Billy the Kid.
Breaking the law, breaking the law... : The life of Henry McCarty may not remotely live up to the life of “Billy the Kid,” but McCarty was indeed involved in the deaths of as many as nine men.
John Dillinger
Born: 1903
Died: 1934
Wanted by: The FBI; the U.S. Department of Justice; lawmen in Ohio, Illinois, Indiana, and Wisconsin.
In life, Dillinger was emblematic of the outlaw Robin Hood, thumbing his nose at every level of law enforcement, namely the established Federal Bureau of Investigation and its chief, J. Edgar Hoover. His sensationalized exploits included escapes from so-called “escape-proof” jails, cinematic flair during hold-ups, a willingness to flaunt his freedom by having his photo taken with admirers, and the remarkable amount of money he and his associates are said to have robbed from banks (into the hundreds of thousands of dollars).
In death, John Dilinger has barely gotten any more peace than Elvis. Shot dead in an FBI ambush outside the Biograph Theater in Chicago, doubts about the true identity of the dead body began almost immediately and have persisted to this day, despite overwhelming evidence proving it was indeed Dillinger.
Today, he is remembered by an endless list of admirers, including the organizers of “John Dillinger Day,” “John Dillinger Died for You Society," “The Dillinger Times Club,” and more.
Breaking the law, breaking the law... : Of Dillinger’s numerous exploits, near the top was his prison escape using a piece of wood shaped like a pistol and his subsequent getaway in the local sheriff’s new car.
Jesse James
Born: 1847
Died: 1882
Wanted by: The Pinkerton National Detective Agency; lawmen in Kentucky, Missouri, Iowa, Minnesota, Texas, Kansas, West Virginia, and Alabama.
Beginning around 1866, the most celebrated outlaw in American history enjoyed an incredibly extensive string of robberies and hold-ups. His crimes stretched across a number of U.S. states, and continued until his death in 1882. For 16 years, despite massive manhunts and even the participation of Allan Pinkerton himself, the founder of the National Detective Agency, James was never once caught or arrested.
His folk-hero status began early, with the help of a newspaper sympathetic to the defeated Confederate cause. He gained tremendous public sympathy when the Pinkertons launched a botched raid on the James family farm that killed Jesse’s half-brother and lopped off his mother’s arm.
James was killed by one of his gang members as he stood on a chair to dust a picture. Why, after 16 years, this uncatchable outlaw let his guard down to tidy up his hideout may never be known, but the legend of James James lives on through museums, festivals, films, televisions shows, and countless songs. At least two men have claimed to be the elderly James, and authorities even disinterred his body to confirm through DNA that the man in his grave was in fact Jesse James.
Breaking the law, breaking the law... : Jesse almost never robbed passengers when holding up a train, a decision that contributed to his Robin Hood image.
Sam Bass
Born: 1851
Died: 1878
Wanted by: The Pinkerton National Detective Agency; Texas Rangers.
Bass was a failed cattle driver and gold miner before becoming an outlaw. After a string of successful robberies, a former gang member sold him out and he was pursued, then gunned down, by the Texas Rangers.
Bass became a folk hero not only because he didn't kill anyone, but because of the public disdain for the railroads he robbed, which many felt were enjoying huge profits from exorbitant rates. To this day, the town of Rosston, Texas, celebrates Sam Bass Day every July.
Breaking the law, breaking the law... : In 1877, Bass and five others robbed a Union Pacific train, coming away with $60,000 in freshly minted gold.
John Wesley Hardin
Born: 1853
Died: 1895
Wanted by: Texas Rangers; lawmen in Kansas, Florida and Alabama.
Hardin is one of the more enigmatic outlaws in history. Unlike many of his contemporaries, he was not a thief; rather, Hardin was a killer -- and a very misunderstood one, if you believe Hardin. He saw himself as a gentleman and a pillar of society, and in his autobiography, he claimed only to have killed in self-defense.
While serving a 25-year prisson sentence, Hardin worked as the prison’s Sunday school superintendent and vigorously studied law. On release from prison, he was admitted to the Texas bar.
Breaking the law, breaking the law... : While an exact figure is unknown, Hardin was probably the era’s most prolific killer, gunning down as many as 30 people
Bill Doolin
Born: 1858
Died: 1896
Wanted by: U.S. Marshals; lawmen in Arkansas, Oklahoma and Kansas.
A member of the Dalton Gang and founder of the famed Wild Bunch (not to be confused with Butch Cassidy’s gang of the same name), Doolin was a prolific robber of trains and stagecoaches. He enjoyed a Robin Hood-esque reputation, which explains how he and his gang managed to elude the law on so many occasions.
The deaths of three U.S. Marshals during shoot-outs with Doolin’s gang made him one of the most wanted men in the nation. Marshals stopped at nothing to track him down, eventually shooting him dead with a single shotgun blast.
Breaking the law, breaking the law... : Doolin and his gang enjoyed their biggest take when they robbed the Santa Fe train station of $6,000 in 1894.
Kid Curry
Born: 1867
Died: 1904
Wanted by: The Pinkerton National Detective Agency; gun-for-hire Tom Horn; lawmen in Wyoming, Utah, Tennessee, New Mexico, and Montana.
Kid Curry (aka Harvey Logan) lived and worked as a rancher until he shot a man to death in a a saloon brawl in 1894. Curry rode with two of the era’s most infamous outlaw groups: Black Jack’s Gang and Butch Cassidy’s Wild Bunch. In between the two he ran his own gang, and altogether participated in dozens of robberies and shoot-outs, all of which contributed to his reputation as one of the Old West’s most dangerous men.
Breaking the law, breaking the law... : Kid Curry was notoriously ruthless, responsible for the shooting deaths of at least 11 men -- nine of them lawmen.
Butch Cassidy
Born: 1866
Died: circa 1908
Wanted by: The Pinkerton National Detective Agency; lawmen in Colorado, Idaho, Utah, Wyoming, New Mexico, Nevada, Montana, and Argentina.
Butch Cassidy (born Robert LeRoy Parker) was one of the era’s most infamous outlaws as well as one of the most successful bank and train robbers.
Contributing to his legend is the contemporary view that Cassidy and the Wild Bunch were non-violent, which is patently false. However, Cassidy’s legend is enhanced by the uncertainty regarding his death; presumably he died in South America, although his body was never found. Not surprisingly, more than a couple less-than-credible people came forward claiming to be Cassidy.
Breaking the law, breaking the law... : Not including a bank heist in Argentina, Cassidy (and his gang) robbed trains and banks for well in excess of $130,000 over the course of his career.
| Posted in »
history,
top 10
Remember when producers of the Itchy & Scratchy Show attempted to liven up their program by introducing Poochie, a skateboard-riding beagle with sunglasses and a backwards hat? That’s exactly what Disney did back in 1992 when they created Goof Troop, an animated show that followed the offbeat adventures of Goofy’s son, Max. However, rather than being a hipper version of his old man, the newest member of the Goofy clan was little more than a thinly disguised marketing ploy created by a bunch of out-of-touch middle-aged suits. Much like Poochie, Max was also universally reviled, forcing Disney to put their ill-advised creation to sleep after just 10 episodes.
What can you say about a character whose audience seems to consist exclusively of prepubescent children and 35-year-old gay men? Maybe they see something we don’t, because every time we tune in we find SpongeBob’s earnest and well-meaning attitude to be more irritating than a lawn dart lodged in our left eye. As if his overbearing optimism weren’t bad enough, this glowing sea sponge always tries far too hard, which inevitably creates problems not only for himself, but for everyone around him too.
No one likes a know-it-all, which is why we’ve always despised Lisa. The glaring weak link in an otherwise brilliant program, Lisa is a boring bookworm whose favorite activities include attending school and reading Non-Threatening Boys magazine. As if she weren’t enough of an irritating ‘90s cartoon character already, this 8-year-old overachiever is also a raging feminist and environmental crusader whose judgmental attitude always prevents others from enjoying themselves. If only she learned to kick back and enjoy a few dozen cans of Duff beer like Homer, we’re sure we’d enjoy her more. 
There’s nothing more annoying than a cartoon character with zero sense of humor, which is why we always rushed to turn the channel whenever we saw Captain Planet on our screen. This holier-than-thou eco avenger is an ancient entity who has been protecting the environment and delivering sleep-inducing lectures about the evils of smog for multiple centuries. Maybe it’s just his feathery green mullet, but we could never take this guy and his rants about recycling newsprint seriously.
Arguably the most annoying anime character ever created, Pikachu was a miniature yellow creature who was so lame he could have had his ass kicked by Hello Kitty. Still, we’ve always wondered what a Pikachu might taste like…
By 1993, America was clamoring for a sequel to Who Framed Roger Rabbit? What they got instead was Bonkers, a cheap knockoff that featured a similarly washed-up movie star with a penchant for slapstick comedy and detective work. Had the principal character been more endearing, it could have worked, but Bonkers D. Bobcat was little more than a pale imitation of Roger whose tired antics were more annoying than absurd. Disney finally realized their mistake two years later and put Bonkers and his costars out of their collective misery by dropping a giant anvil on the series.
Although science has yet to confirm our suspicions, we’re convinced that the only sound more annoying than fingernails on a chalkboard is the ungodly screech of Gilbert Gottfried’s voice; that’s just one of the reasons we labeled Iago one of the most irritating ‘90s cartoon characters. He was also a villainous scarlet macaw who performed the evil bidding of his master Jafar. We also hated his seemingly endless sarcastic rants that had all the bite of a toothless poodle. Hey, if we wanted to hear an angry diatribe, we’d just listen to our girlfriends.
We’ve never trusted children. They’re frequently spoiled and ill-tempered, and Angelica Pickles is certainly no exception. This bratty little 3 year old is a hellion with pigtails who keeps her neglectful parents under her tiny little thumb. If Angelica were our little girl, we would have given her an extended time-out that would have lasted until her 21st birthday.
Just because a character is the focal point of an amusing comic strip, doesn’t mean that he has the charisma to star in his very own half-hour cartoon show. That was the case with Dilbert, our No. 7 irritating ‘90s cartoon character. He was an excruciatingly boring electrical engineer whose life was as dull as his red- and black-striped tie. Luckily for us, producers came to their senses and gave this office drone the pink slip after just 10 episodes.
